Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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