When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
