just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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