Plan B is the new Plan A
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
