Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
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