i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
