Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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