i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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