Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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