What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize