I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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