What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
