Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
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