HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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