considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I wish i was in the wii world.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
