You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
