The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
