goodnight i made you a song goodbye
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Randomize
