She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
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