porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
the liver wants what the liver wants
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Randomize
