The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
