the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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