So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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