Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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