You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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