Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
