Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
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