her vagine was all disorganized.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
