i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
this just has baby written all over it
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Randomize
