theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Randomize
