Can Purell be used as lube?
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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