And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
