Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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