bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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