im about as happy as oj after his trial
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
