Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Barsexuality is the new black.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
