I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
