Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
