so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
