dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
You made out with two different species that night
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
