Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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