If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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