i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
The power of my boobs compel you
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
