its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize
