Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Randomize
