oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I think I just sharted jello shots
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize