So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
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