An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
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