It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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