you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize
