ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
