Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
